It’s Worth It, Right?

“Stacy, could I call you to discuss the pros and cons of homeschooling?”

This was the text I received not too long ago from a sweet mama feeling torn between a career she loved and an invitation she sensed was growing. I wanted to offer her thoughtful replies to what would undoubtedly be a vulnerable conversation. Goodness, I could certainly identify with both her decision and her turmoil.

Maybe you can relate to this mama also. Or maybe you are this mama. Or maybe, just maybe, you could use a little reminder that it’s worth it. If so, feel free to listen in to our conversation:

Everything in life has pros and cons, right? Trade-offs are real. Saying yes to one thing is saying no to oodles more. Homeschooling is no different. Anyone who says it’s all puppies and glitter is only half-wrong. There’s a decent amount of glitter. I’m kidding.

When I think of homeschooling I’m reminded of a premise author Emily P. Freeman describes: “We’re building for the years we cannot see.” (You can check out her podcast here: Build for the Years You Can't See.) Homeschooling is heavy on the initial investment, and I don’t just mean financially.

Since most people want the bad news first, I’ll start there. I actually wouldn’t even describe these as cons or “bad.” A better description than cons would probably be awareness. These are the bumps to navigate, things to be aware of, or just raw truth about my homeschool experience:

·         Investment- Homeschooling is costly. It will cost you your time, “freedom,” finances, and present dreams or goals. (Almost every homeschool mom I know is a highly-educated woman who deferred her own career or dreams to pour into her kiddos.)

·         Energy Levels- I didn’t realize how tired I actually was until I started homeschooling. The physical toll was a learning curve, and I was caught off-guard by how fatiguing it is to sit, read, play, and be “on” all.the.time. It was also mentally exhausting explaining to others or myself why we were choosing (and continuing to choose) this lifestyle.

·         Isolating- Homeschooling is often a hidden, overlooked, and mundane season. It’s a lot of putting one foot in front of the other. Consistent choices add up over the long haul, but it can feel very lonely some days. You will 100% have days (maybe not many, but some) where you longingly look at that yellow school bus driving down the road without your children on board.

·         Exposing- There is nowhere to hide when you homeschool. All your junk hangs out. I often call it holiness boot camp. In addition, you’ll lack confidence and second-guess that you’re doing it “right,” as if that’s an identifiable target.

But there’s good news. The benefits exponentially outweigh the costs. It’s an honor and a gift to homeschool. The time, foundation, formation, and shaping in my kids (and myself) is invaluable.

I don’t know what the conclusion and final results of this experience will be. I do know I won’t regret the decision to be *with* my kids. You see, the things I know about my children far surpass basic, superficial information. Our relationship is far deeper than “What’s your favorite color?” and “Who is your best friend?” I know how to navigate their hearts, how to strategize for their weaknesses, and I help them develop tools to nurture those spots.

I have a front row seat for all.the.things, and I love it. It’s a sacrifice, yes and amen! Our family is a one-income household, and that makes our financial landscape different than many other families. We’ve bypassed a larger home and newer vehicles. I’ve traded working for an income to invest in a future.

In fact, some of the things I’ve “given up” are likely byproducts of American culture: striving, lack of boundaries, excess stuff, debt, cramped schedules, and opportunity overload.

To me, one of the greatest gifts of homeschooling isn’t academic. The scholastic achievements are small bonuses in light of who they’re becoming as humans. I do appreciate knowing everything they’re learning and the ability to curate to their natural leanings. Of course. But possibly what I love most of all is that homeschooling has given me the gift of childhood, again. I’m seeing it through their eyes and re-living it through mine. I’m meeting Jesus again and again alongside my children. I’m hearing their imaginations, their curiosity, their interpretations of the world and the Word. And I.am.here.for.it!

Is it hard? Absolutely. Is it lonely? Yep, sometimes. Exhausting? Oh, yes, in all the ways. Is it weird? Also, yep, sometimes. Is it worth it? Forever. Even on the hard days, I will never regret this time with my kids. (And neither will you.) You’re not alone in this. I’m praying for you, friend… all along the way.